CONVERSATION

As a father of 4 I take great pride in my children. Like all kids they have made some decisions that have turned out real well for them and some decisions that have not turned out so hot. But that is the part of growing up that will help define their lives.

Living so far apart from all of them has me an emotional wreck at times. I miss out on so much. So, phone calls and of course text messaging are very important. I love it when from out of nowhere one of my kids text (which is how it usually happens) because that's most all our nature now. It's easy, convenient and simple. Now when one of them picks up the phone and actually calls to say "hey dad", that means a lot to me. Tells me that I might just be on their mind as much as they are on mine.

Now, on the other hand, it is even more difficult when you continually reach out to one of your children through phone calls and of course text messages and get nothing back. No answer, no returned call or not even a returned text. That is the back breaking moment when your mind begins to wander over every decision you have ever made in your life. Where did I go wrong to deserve this from my blood? I would like to think not but then again you never know when you can't talk to them.

The paths I have been on in my life have put me on way too many roads....but those roads have made me who I am. I know these paths have hurt people that were in them as well as hurt me as I was traveling them. I have done and will continue to do the best I possibly can. I am sorry if it hasn't been perfect for everyone involved but God didn't make me to be perfect, He made me to be me. To do the right things, follow the right paths and to hopefully be a good person to others.

I don't care what I have as far as "things" in my life. I just want my family.